My Girls Are Waiting For Me

Its Sunday, 4 days post surgery and I feel much better. I can do half a lap around the 16th floor, and yes I am still here on the wrong floor.

My floor assistant has brought me a towel, soap, and I'm ready to be saran wrapped so I can shower. The shower is down the hall and around the bend. As we walk, she asks how dad is. I reply with doing okay, except a man in his room passed yesterday. He is very upset and emotional today. She reminds me that she knows how strong I am and that she can feel that dad will be perfectly fine. She wraps me up tight and waits outside for me.

The water feels fantastic, but hell, this is not easy. My hair can wait, its wet and that's good enough. Again remember, less "underclothes" the better. Nothing is easy to put on or take off. As I open the door, the assistant is waiting for me. She takes me by the arm and we walk, slowly, back to my room. She helps me pack my bag and says she will see me out in a bit. I call my dad and he seems a bit down today. All he says is that he's sore and the food sucks. I agreed. I tell him I'm coming to see him.

When I get back their is a disgusting egg wrap for breakfast? Not really sure what exactly it is to be honest. They want me to eat, but this is not edible. As I'm picking at it (basically disassembling it like a toddler would), my transplant team comes in. I am discharged and ready to go home.

About a half an hour later the assistant comes back in and helps me to the elevator. I ask her how to get to the wing my dad is on. She quietly tells me, wishes me the best, and I get on the elevator. Hell, I shouldn't have packed half the shit in this bag, its heavy so I'm basically dragging it.

I get to the main floor, there is no way I'm going to make it to my dads wing. I'm exhausted and have already taken 3 breaks by leaning up against the wall. A bit of panic starts to set in. I want to see my dad so badly, but I simply can't make it to him. I'm left alone to get from the 16th floor to the main (basement) floor, up the ramp, to the street entrance. I stop and wait for this awful feeling to pass. Sorry dad, I'm not going to make it to say good bye.

As I make my way to the street entrance, I'm told to wait in the seat. A few minutes pass and I hear my mom tell the security she's here to pick me up. I stand up, and I feel so relieved. My grandpa has been my driver and he doesn't say much. He doesn't have to because his face says it all. Worry and relief all wrapped into one. As I get into the back, flashbacks of being little and riding in grandpas truck, I better buckle up and take my coat off. Its going to be hot bumpy ride. As my mom had already seen my dad yesterday, she can't go in today. So its time to go home. My girls are waiting for me.